Sportlife Hack – Do it like a dude!

‘I can do it like a brother, do it like a dude…’ Thanks Jessie J for your inspirational words circa 2010.

This was a song that I blasted at full noise while lifting weights in the gym, running hard, or sometimes while just pushing the vacuum ‘round the house.  But, damn that song would wind me up, in a good way.

Well, now it seems I can – do it like a dude that is.  We have the power and technology to allow me to wee, standing up, like a dude.  Introducing the Sheewee.  Many of you will have heard of this amazing empowering device.  A number would have screwed your faces up, and proclaimed, ‘but, then I have to carry it, and it’s dirty.’ With visions of yourself walking along the track barely visible due to the cloud of flies circling your clearly filthy self. 

Cue, an eye roll from me, and a confession that I thought the same. But, now that I’m branching into different sports, and having spoken to some women on their fears and vulnerabilities, I thought it was time that I gave the Shewee a fair hearing and a trial. Following is my Shewee review.

The first time I had to take a nature wee, I was fresh outta living a very urban life in Auckland – big glasses, nails, impeccable make-up, I was a shiny picture of perfection and had ALWAYS used a toilet. So what? I had to pee, in a bush, with no toilet paper?? Ahh no, gross and nope again.  Unfortunately (or fortunately, though it didn’t feel it at the time) this particular trip had no toilets, a long drive to the trailhead and took about 3 hours longer than we were planning.  I had held on for as long as I could and with a racing heart and the awareness of a vulnerable hunted animal in the bush, I found a place to bare my bum and pop a squat. 

Now I tell you, something happened at that moment, the time-space continuum folded in on itself and time warped. I swear that pee took 5 minutes, all the while I was nervously looking around wondering if this wee will ever end.  It did. I was fine. On shaking legs I returned to our hike, silently patting myself on the back for a job well done. Also, from that moment I realised nature wees weren’t so bad.  Since that time I have dropped my shorts for more nature wees than I can count, and most times I have had to hold on to find a suitable place to hide, many times bemoaning that my junk didn’t allow me to just go where I pleased like my male counterparts.  It also annoyed me that when I wanted to wee, my pants were around my ankles and my bum on full display.

In the last few years, I had just accepted my place in the world as a second rate nature wee’er ( yup I just made up a word), until recently when the Shewee came onto my radar again.  I discovered in mountaineering circles the Sheewee is used for practical reasons, for not having to get your kit off in the freezing cold, smart huh? and, more importantly, a conversation with a friend who said she was put off going into the outdoors for anything long that might require a nature wee because she felt nervous, vulnerable and unsafe, popping a squat with pants or shorts around her ankles. I was shocked that she felt this way, but on researching the topic it seemed she wasn’t alone.

So it seemed like it was time for me to put my judgments aside and find out what kind of freedom would come to me if I could do it like a dude.  My Sheewee extreme arrived, and I have to say I felt a little bit badass – I think the name ‘extreme’ helps! I promptly put it to the test with some practice runs before I took it on its maiden mission, a bush-bashing hike.

Things I learnt after my Shewee test and review:

  • The Shewee is super easy to use
  • It feels weird to pee standing up!
  • I could go wherever I pleased without looking for something to hide behind
  • Not having to get your kit off to pee felt pretty good
  • Shewees aren’t just for adventures, but long car trips, festivals, dirty public toilets, boating trips, anywhere you might want to pee!
  • The Shewee provides freedom and empowerment to women

So, my verdict. I’m sold and the Shewee will definitely become part of my nature kit (and in the glove box for emergencies on long trips). It’s not icky and gross, it’s just super helpful and a handy device to have.

Have you got a good story of a nature wee…maybe one that went wrong? Or right?

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